How many times a day do we apologize for the silliest things? I'm sorry this house is such a mess. I'm sorry I didn't get to the dishes this time. I'm sorry, she usually doesn't act like this. I'm sorry, I have no idea what to do for dinner tonight. I'm sorry, I usually don't look this terrible, I didn't have time to do my hair this morning.
Who are we apologizing to? Is it really to the other person? And honestly, if the person you were apologizing to really demanded that explanation, would that be someone you would really want in your life?
So why do we do it to ourselves?
I am an over-apologizer to the nth degree. Old habits die hard. But I believe that getting past all of that negativity is a slow process, the first part of which is being mindful of the problem. So take my hand (Sorry, they are clammy. Ha!), and let's take that leap of acceptance. Show a little more gratitude to ourselves.
This is the biggest reason I am a storytelling photographer - because there is nothing more amazing than real, unscripted life. And if I'm going to be completely honest, I still frequently get those twinges of "man, that photo would have been even better had I color-coordinated my daughter's outfit". And yes, maybe it would have gotten more mileage out there on the internet. But it wouldn't have been genuine. My daughter hardly ever has matching clothes when we're at home. We throw on whatever shorts and shirts are at the top of the "pile" - be it in the dresser or the floor.
My favorite outfit at home is a pair of second-hand pink velour lounge pants (so early 2000s of me!) and a horribly kitsch two-cat moon shirt I made my husband buy me when he was at a truck stop in Nebraska. They are both so ugly together, but they're incredibly comfortable and the last thing I care about at home is looking chic. And while I'm not suggesting we all give up putting our best face forward in favor of those memaw sundresses you see in the back of coupon mailers, I am saying that you don't have to look impeccably stylish in order to have a compelling life.
(Although, lets face it, a two-cat moon shirt is basically on the same playing field as a coupon mailer memaw sundress, so maybe I could use some style lessons.)
When you book a session with a storytelling photographer like myself, know that to us your home is an incredible place that we are so honored to photographed. What you might perceive as a flaw - the things you constantly apologize to yourself about - are nothing short of beautiful to us. Your home is a refuge, a place to be able to kick off your shoes and let down your hair - a place to be "you".
So if you cringe because your daughter would rather wear a sparkly unicorn t-shirt than that simple white dress you love - don't. We love capturing the enthusiasm she has for it. If you're terrified of us seeing that the sofa in your living room is a little worse for wear - don't be. To a photographer, the wear and tear just means more stories and more life has happened there. If you're chasing your son around with a wet nap because his face with stained with chocolate ice cream - slow down! We will pretty much beg you to capture that face in a photograph before you clean him up.